May 8th
by StraightLegScorp
Summary: It is Katniss' birthday and she finds out about Gale & Madge having sex. Nothing inappropriate really happens in this one. Katniss/Gale. Makes more sense if you read "A New Beginning" first.
1. May 8th

I slip in quietly and walk on hunter's feet. I creep silently through the house to the large kitchen area, placing the note on the table along with a small gift. For a moment, I am frozen in time, taking in my surroundings. Katniss is all around me – her scent, her picture, her belongings – and I love it. I wish I could do this ever day.

It is nearly dawn and I don't want anyone seeing me. It would ruin everything. I walk up the winding staircase to peek into Katniss' bedroom, and I am startled by a noise. I peek through the crack and see Katniss thrashing from a nightmare. She is calling out for her father. Trying to save him, to protect him. Seeing her like that, in so much pain, it makes me want to go comfort her, but I can't right now.

I hear a hiss from behind me and whirl around. Buttercup is staring me in the eyes. I take quiet, weightless steps so that Buttercup doesn't hiss again. I wouldn't want to wake them on a special day like today. I slip out the window that has been left ajar, and head for the short detour before going to the woods. I walk to the bakery and to Marry's house to place the remaining two notes and make sure that Mr. Mellark and Marry are prepared. Hopefully Katniss will understand what I'm trying to say – my underlying message.

I sit on our rock and wait for her to appear. After two hours of waiting and a small amount of hunting, Katniss still has not shown. She is a morning person, so I wonder what could be taking her so long.

I think about the three notes and gifts that I left her.

Note one read, "_HAPPY BIRTHDAY BEST FRIEND! I hope you have a good one! Swing by the bakery, Mr. Mellark is waiting to give you something! ~ Gale."_

Note two read, "_Enjoy your shortbread cookies! I give you permission to walk right into my house if you want to stop and pick up the syrup that's in the fridge! ~ Gale."_

Note three read, _"Now for something that requires your mothers permission. Please make the short trip down the river to Madge's house. She is expecting you, and she has something for you. ~ Gale."_

Note four read, _"I kindly ask that you now walk down to Marry's house to pick up some candies that her mother sells. She also has your last note. Enjoy! ~ Gale.__"_

Note five read, _"Lastly, come back the way you came, but stop at Peeta's house. He has some news for you. ~ Gale."_

I'm not sure if Catnip will understand what I'm trying to say but I hope she does. It's like a code. You take one work from odd numbered notes and two words from even numbered notes. You take the 5th word from the first note, the sixth and seventh words from the second note, the eighth word from the third note, the ninth and tenth word from the fourth note, and the eleventh word from the last. After that, you put it all together to make one sentence.

Katniss and I used that code when we were younger. It was sort of like a game and I hope that she remembers it. I know that this birthday wish is something that Katniss would want. She wants to make sure that if she is with Peeta, she won't be hurting me. Or if she is with me, she won't be hurting Peeta.

It might be painful watching the girl I love be with that baker kid, but if you love something, you must set it free. If it comes back, it's yours, if it doesn't, it never was.

Katniss still hasn't arrived yet and I even told Marry to tell her to meet me in the woods. I begin to over think possible reasons why she could be absent. Maybe someone maliciously killed her on her birthday. Probably not though. Maybe she went to see Peeta right now because she understood my code! It's not very likely though, and I assume that she would come thank me first anyway. Maybe she got injured. Or fell in the river and drowned. Or got eaten by a bear. Or maybe she didn't even wake up yet.

I am conflicted because if I leave, Katniss may show up and I will be gone. But if I stay, she may never come and I will miss the remainder of her birthday. After about a half hour of over thinking the situation, I decide to make the trip to the Everdeen's house. When I arrive, Prim seems thrilled.

"Oh Gale! Thank goodness you are here!" She trills. However, her voice drops and she seems worried sick. "It's Katniss. She locked herself in her bedroom after collecting your notes and making her way home. We have absolutely no idea what to do! You have to help us! Please!"

My throat tightens and I can barely get my next words out, " I will try anything."

I take a minute to go to the bathroom and wash my face. She hates me! I know it! She figured out the message and thinks I'm an idiot! I take deep breaths trying to calm myself. "Relax. Just relax," I whisper to myself. My face smoothes and all of my anxiety dissipates.

I knock quietly on the bedroom door and Katniss opens it a crack. "Hey Catnip, mind if I come in?" I ask grinning slightly. I can see the pain in her gray eyes and I know that what I have done has hurt her. She mustn't want to speak to me at all, but she allows me to enter.

I sit across from her on the bed, examining her face. She looks to be on the verge of tears, but the red blotches on her cheeks makes me think that she has previously been crying. It's not that she is mad exactly… she just looks sad. Like the way a person looks when they have lost someone or something very close to them. Oh no! Maybe Peeta told her that he doesn't want to be with her! But how can that be? He loves her, as much as I do, doesn't he?

"So, what are you doing here?" Katniss croaks. I stare at her, bewildered.

"You really don't know what I'm doing here? Because it couldn't possible have anything to do with the fact that you didn't show up in the woods and I waited for you for hours!" I reply, raising my voice.

"What are you talking about? I never did or didn't do anything! It's you who should be sorry! I got your first note and went to the bakery. Mr. Mellark was very kind, giving me cookies, bread and your second note. I went to your house, got the corn syrup and made my way to Madge's. I saw Madge right away because she was outside writing in a journal. I took one look at the page and Mrs. Hawthorne, Madge Hawthorne, Mr. and Mrs. Gale Hawthorne was written ALL over it! Want to explain that to me Gale?" she screams back accusingly.

My face drops. It wasn't my hidden message after all! But it was still something that I had done. Katniss storms out of the room and I follow. "Katniss! Katniss!" I holler her name. "It was nothing! Nothing even happened!" Katniss begins to sprint and I don't stop chasing after her. She slides under the unhitched fence with ease but it takes me a minute to guide my large body under it. She doesn't stop running until she makes it to the river.

She begins to climb a nearby tree and I go up after her. "I don't want to talk about it Gale!" she screams angrily. I stand there for a moment and think of how Katniss had looked like she lost someone that she loves. I realize that I am that someone. She thinks that she has lost me to Madge.

I think back to when it happened. How I wanted Katniss to be jealous. Now, I can see that I don't want that. I just want my best friend back. I scale the large tree, but Katniss is already on branches too slim to hold my weight. "Katniss! I'm loveable! I can't help that!" I say jokingly. She rolls her eyes and turns away from me.

"Well Happy Birthday anyway. I guess you never found out what my gift was. And maybe you never will," I say trying to make her come down. She mumbles something in dissent.

I begin to climb down the tree with caution, since I got up pretty high myself. I sit at the bottom of the tree, just waiting for her to come down. Then I realize this scene is all too familiar. People trapping Katniss in a tree. It could only have happened in the Hunger Games. But Katniss will always find a way to get away from the enemy.

Instead of sitting around uselessly, I swim, I hunt, and I catch fish and waterfowl. I look up to check on Katniss, still perched in the tree. I look back down for a moment at the bird's feathers I am plucking and look back up only to see that she has disappeared.

Exhausted and annoyed, I make the long journey back home. There is nothing more that I can do until Katniss is willing to talk to me. I know that Mrs. Everdeen and Prim will be extremely worried, so I make a trip to their house.

I can hear sobbing inside, so I decide to knock. "What does he want now? To hurt my baby girl even more? He has already done enough damage to last a lifetime!" Katniss' protective mother growls angrily. I hear the screech of a chair and the padding of little feet against the floor. Prim opens the door a smidgen and slips outside. Through the crack, I can see Katniss sitting on a chair with her mothers arms wrapped around her. Tears stream down her face and I am heart broken.

Prim glares at me with an accusing look. "Here to confess to your doing _things_ with Katniss' best girl friend?" Prim whispers roughly.

"Actually, I wanted to let you know that Katniss is alright but I guess you already know that," I whisper back. "

Oh, she is_ far_ from _alright_! She has never cried this much in her entire life! You really hurt her, Gale!" Prim says with sadness in her voice.

"I'm sorry! I really didn't mean to hurt her! Katniss is my best friend! And maybe even something more!" I try to persuade her. "Don't tell me," Prim replies. "Tell Katniss." "She won't even talk to me," I sigh.

"Maybe you don't deserve to be talked to. Will your side of the story really change how she thinks of you now?" Prim questions.

"I just want to talk to her!" I say sternly.

"Well maybe you can tomorrow, when you're done breaking my sister's heart," she says back in the same stern tone. Then something strange happens.

Prim whispers, "Gale, please do the right thing. I want you to be friends with Katniss still. Tomorrow, when you talk to her, confess and apologize. Find some way to make it up to her."

Prim turns to go inside and I begin to walk away. I stop as I get to the last step, "Hey, Prim!" I holler. She turns and I mouth '_Thank you'_. Prim just nods as if to say your welcome, now don't screw it up again. I walk down the creaky steps and around the dirt path corner only to find myself face to face with Madge.

"Hey Gale, I was just looking for you," Madge says flirtatiously flipping her perfectly styled hair.

"Madge, now is not the time," I reply angrily.

"But Gale, I was thinking maybe we could hang out again," she says stroking my chin.

"Enough!" I scream at her, "I can't do this anymore! Katniss is my best friend and you have ruined that! So don't make it any worse! Just don't talk to me!"

I rip her hand off that is gripping my wrist, and run past her. I want to lock myself somewhere where I can't be hurting anyone. I guess that's all I do now, _hurt_ people. I hurt Katniss if I'm with Madge and I hurt Madge if I'm with Katniss. I sigh, exasperated.

I guess I'm only doing the same thing that Katniss is doing to Peeta and me. So why is she so angry? She kissed Peeta and I had sex with Madge. Is it because of that one time that I kissed her after she was in the games, but before the tour? I never thought that she actually thought of me as anything other than her best friend.

I collapse into the rough sheets on my hard mattress, dreaming of Madge's silky wonderland. The sun rises and the birds are singing outside. I dress in slacks and a button down, eating a couple pieces of bread with corn syrup spread on them. I find a piece of parchment and some ink to write one more note to Katniss.

It reads, "_Catnip, we really need to talk. We have been to hell and back together and I could never betray or forget a person who accompanied me on a horrifying journey like that. You have helped me and I have helped you, but we need to talk about the future. About our future. If we still have one. Meet me in the woods. ~ Gale."_

I walk through the square which reminds me too much of Katniss volunteering to protect Prim, and down the path to the victors village. I place the note on the doormat and ring the bell once. I run around the side of an empty house so that I am not seen. Mrs. Everdeen opens the front door and looks to see who has disturbed them. She see's the note on the floor and picks it up.

She opens it carefully and then reads its contents. She is about to tear it into pieces when Katniss comes to the door. "What's that?" I hear Katniss say.

"Uh, it's a note. It's for you. From, uh," she stutters, trying to get the words out.

"Gale," Katniss finishes her sentence. She takes the slip of paper and evacuates to her room.

Her mother sighs and closes the door behind her.

The forest is quiet and peaceful, just the way I like it. It is only May, but flowers are blooming and the air has a warm feel to it. It's very refreshing. Katniss appears behind me, it's truly amazing how silent she can be when she wants to.

"So you wanted to talk," she whispers, "I'm all ears."

"Can you just tell me why you are so mad at me?" I ask, hoping for something that will make sense.

"You really don't know? I thought you knew me inside out," she replies, clearly heart broken. It's true though, I do know her inside out. Or I'm supposed to anyway.

"I do know you, normally. But I have no idea what you're thinking right now," I say, trying to figure her out.

"Why did you have sex with Madge," Katniss says bluntly.

"I didn't think it would matter to you. You know, since you have Peeta," I say honestly.

"Well it does matter, Gale. You are my best friend and I feel like I'm losing you to Madge," Katniss replies sadly. Turns out I did know what she was thinking. She was afraid of losing me.

"Katniss, can't you see that I would never let that happen? I can't stand the though of not being in your life, as your friend at least," I say stepping towards her.

"Just tell me why Gale," she pleads.

"Honestly," I sigh, "I knew that eventually you would end up with Peeta, so I should just forget any feelings I ever felt towards you. I decided to move on to someone who is sure that they love me."

"But what if I don't want to be with Peeta? Why does everyone want to decide my future with him? I'm more than just a piece in whatever sick, twisted game this is. I didn't even know I was being played with," Katniss replies letting a tear escape but brushing it away softly.

"I'm not playing any game Katniss. It was a one-time thing okay? I can't stop her from saying she loves me! I don't even know if I love her back!" I insist.

"But what about me, Gale? Have you just forgotten about me? Did you just move on as soon as the games started? Did you really have that little faith in me?" Katniss questions, and I can hear the agonizing pain in her voice.

"Of course not Katniss. I just saw you getting all close with Peeta and I guess I… I got sort of… umm… jealous. Katniss I have loved you for a while now and maybe I just wanted you to be jealous of me too. See how it feels to have the one you love publicly introduced as a star-crossed lover with someone other than you," I sigh.

For some reason, Katniss has this look on her face like she understands exactly what I mean. "That was basically the very first thing I thought of when I heard about you and Madge. We are partners and best friends. I have you. You have me. Anything else is unthinkable," she replies hastily, "I guess I just never thought of it that way until now. I was jealous when I heard about you and Madge. I guess it rubbed me the wrong way."

"Well I can't stop Peeta from loving you, and you can't stop Madge from loving me," I say with a sigh.

"So what are we going to do?" Katniss questions, exasperation in her voice.

"What we've been doing all along," I whisper, my face falling, "Hurting each other and then putting the broken pieces of what used to be us, back together again." Katniss and I do not have that unbreakable bond anymore. We are no longer two parts of one being. We have been shattered, smashed, broken, crushed, stomped on, glued back together, remade, fixed, repaired and _replaced_. I have replaced Katniss with Madge in my time of need, and Katniss has replaced me with Peeta in hers.

I realize that while we were talking I had continued to move forward, and now sit on our rock with her. She is staring down at the ground, as if to avoid my gaze. I lift her chin and stare into those beautiful gray eyes. This time, when I kiss her, she kisses back. Her arms wrap around my neck and her fingers comb through my hair. I try to keep kissing her but she moves away, her eyes fixated on something in the distance.

I try to see what she is looking at but I just see the forest. Then I catch sight of the long, blonde braid slipping behind a tree. Katniss begins to run after the blonde hair, blue eye child. She stops and embraces her. I walk silently towards them and hide behind a tree when I am in hearing range.

"Katniss, I was so worried!" Prim sobs.

"About what, Prim? There is nothing to worry about," Katniss reassures her.

"I just didn't want Gale to hurt you again, so I followed you to make sure that you were okay," Prim manages through sobs and Katniss wipes away the falling tears.

"Hey, it's okay, little duck," a small grin appears on Katniss' face, "I promise that Gale won't ever hurt me that way again. He just needed human closeness, and I wasn't here to offer any."

"Have you and Gale had sex?" Prim questions wonderingly. Katniss' smile disappears and her face hardens.

When she answers the question, her voice is barely audible, "No, and we never will." Her voice takes on a sort of certainty that I have never heard before.

* * *

**Please review! And let me know if you want me to write more!**


	2. May 7th

May 7th: Preparations

"Is it done? Burned? Incinerated? Nothing but a charred black heap?" I ask with a wicked smile appearing on my anxious face.

"I threw it in the fire and watched it turn to ashes, so I guess you could say yes," Rory says with a small, proud smile.

His face flickers with remembrance and he looks up to me excitedly.

"Can I have it now?" he asks with such enthusiasm in his voice, that I'm afraid he will explode.

In response, I slip inside my house and quickly walk to the kitchen. I slide over a small wooden stool and rummage through the top cupboard until I find the cookies that my father purchased at Mr. Mellark's bakery a few days ago. I hop off of the stool on wobbly feet, and scurry back towards the back door of my house.

I hold out the box to Rory and he grins a smile that stretches from ear to ear.

"Thanks Madge!" he says with delight, "They're perfect!"

I smile half-heartedly and close the door tightly as Rory walks away happily, humming some love song. I lean against the wooden door and sigh as tears fill my eyes. _I'm such a terrible person_, I think to myself.

I am so awful! I cannot believe I just did that to Katniss! She is my only girl friend and I'm treating her like the dirt beneath my feet. I can hardly believe that my jealousy of Katniss and Gale's relationship is keeping me from acting maturely and doing the right thing.

If I sit outside with my book of married names with Gale, maybe it will distract Katniss from retrieving the note that Gale asked me to give her. Why did he ask me anyway? He knows that I have feelings for him! That is so incredibly rude! Asking someone who loves you to do a favour for the person you love. If Effie were here, she would probably be giving him a lecture on manners by now.

It's enough that I burned the note, but now I'm thinking about creating diversions so that my actions go unnoticed? That is a new level of low for me. I cannot believe how ridiculous I'm being! That note barely said anything! I shouldn't have burned it because now I will be getting myself into a much deeper trench of disrespect and lies.

I sink to the floor and put my head in my hands, constantly wondering that one question that will never truly leave. _What am I going to do?_

I dice the carrots meticulously, being careful not to cut myself with the thick, sharp blade. I am mostly focusing on making dinner so that I don't have to think anymore about what a cruel and heartless person I am. I scoop up all of the orange pieces of carrot, and drop them into the pot along with the rest of the ingredients for the stew.

Ever since my father has become the Mayor, my mother has had to rely on me to make dinner every night. She gets these horrific migraines that can last for days, so she normally stays locked up in her room and only opens the door when I bring her breakfast, lunch, dinner and her medicine.

I use the wooden ladle to scoop some of the vegetable stew into a ceramic bowl, placing it on a wooden tray with cutlery already set. I quickly whip up a soothing herbal tea that I learned from Mrs. Everdeen. Thinking about Katniss' mother twists my stomach uncontrollably and I make it to the garbage just in time for my lunch to come up. I gently place a cool cloth on my ghostly forehead. Quickly remembering the warm soup and tea, I pour a cold glass of water and reach for the small bottle of pain pills in the top cupboard.

I walk up the winding, wooden staircase, carefully holding the tray so that the contents don't spill. Over the years I have become fairly talented with this though. If there were an Olympics for balancing trays, I would definitely be a part of it. I knock gingerly on her bedroom door, not wanting to wake her but knowing how important her nutrition is.

From experience, I have learned that the pain is worse when she hasn't eaten anything that day. Chocolate is also not helpful or soothing as one might think. Sometimes, chocolate can actually be the cause of the headache in the first place.

When she doesn't answer, I push open the door and walk to the end of her bed. The covers have been pushed to the end – she probably got hot while she was sleeping – and she is sprawled on her stomach with an ice pack still pressed against her forehead. I sit at the edge of the silky blue sheets, dreading the moment that I will have to wake her from her peaceful slumber. I need to though, since it helps and it's the only thing I _can_ do to help the agonizing pain.

I gently place my hand on her upper back, as I have many times before, and I begin to rub small, soothing circles. When she still doesn't rouse, I lightly trace the outlines and crevices of my mother's back, moving my thin fingers in swift motions as I trace all the way down to her palms.

"That feels good," she says groggily as her bright blue eyes pop open and shimmer in the afternoon light.

"I made you dinner," I say with a small smile.

"What time is it?" she asks as she groans, suddenly clutching her head as if somehow by holding on to it, she can ebb the pain.

"Just after five," I reply as I stand and walk over to the large bay window, pushing aside the blinds so that I can look out onto the street full of other merchants' houses, "I made vegetable stew."

"What about vegetable stew and medicine?" she jokes as a half-hearted smile appears on her lips, not fully reaching her eyes.

I don't remember a time when those eyes were never filled with fear and sorrow. Ever since my mother's sister died in the games when they were little, my mother has been grieving. I do however recall one time when I was shown a photograph of my mother, my aunt and, to my dismay, Katniss' mother. In the photo, they were all best friends and had all been joyful and excited about something. But since then, every single one of them has lost something to the Capitol. My mother lost her sister, my aunt lost her life, and Mrs. Everdeen lost not only her close friend, but her husband as well.

"Am I terrible person?" I ask suddenly, wiping the smile off of my mother's face.

"If you were a terrible person Madge, then why would you keep being so kind and understanding to me?" she replies with another question, not really giving me a straight answer.

I collapse onto the cushiony bed and bury my face in a pillow.

"I did something very bad," I say in a muffled voice, since the pillow is covering my mouth.

"We all make mistakes darling," she says as she brushes aside a loose strand of my silky blonde hair, "Just because you make some poor choices it doesn't mean you're a bad person, it just means your _human_."

She purses her lips as if she is about to add something else, but decides not to. I know that my mother is only trying to comfort me and she actually isn't wrong, but it doesn't make me feel any better.

"Then I must be an atrocious human," I say as I cup my hands over my face, trying desperately to block out the world so that maybe I won't have to face Katniss tomorrow and tell her what happened to the note.

"What'd you do baby?" my mother asks as she adjusts the cold cloth on her forehead and takes another sip of tea.

"It's not only what I did, it's also what I'm about to do."

"You're in love, aren't you?" she asks with the slightest hint of a smile on her pale face.

I just gently nod my head in reply, knowing that my voice will be jumping all over the place.

"You know when I was about your age, I did some pretty despicable things too, for love," she says absent mindedly, staring into the dreamland of memories, "When I loved your father, and another girl asked him to the school dance…Well, let's just say I made sure that she wouldn't be able to go."

At this, my mouth hangs open and I stare wide-eyed at my once beautiful mother. Recently, my mother's migraines have been becoming more frequent as well as more painful. We haven't had a mother-daughter sort of talk like this since I was a little girl.

"And even though I felt like an abhorrent person, I went to that girl's home when she was throwing up, and I apologized and held her orange locks up while her dinner came out in the toilet," she continues, not realizing that my mouth is still agape.

"Did you go to the dance with dad?" I ask curiously, not knowing the right thing to do, "And how did you still end up with him? Did you tell him that you made his date sick?"

"Whoa there! My little inquisitive girl," she says with a wink, "You take after your mother you know."

"What does that mean?" I ask, confused by all of her prodigious words.

"It means I know that you'll do the right thing."


End file.
